Bryan Dijkhuizen

How To Become More Mindful While Being Very Chaotic

While many of us are ending up in burnout, stoics aren’t. They’re in perfect control of their lives by controlling the things they worry about.

Those people have discipline.

Most of us don’t and that’s costing us deeply. By letting our bad habits slip in at all moments, our lives are living us instead of the other way around.

It’s tempting to give in when things are getting worse. But we shouldn’t.

Stoicism says exactly that.

Here’s how Stoicism can help to live a very mindful and disciplined life while you’re very chaotic (like me).

Are You Chaotic and Worrisome?

First of all, you need to know if you’re a person that can benefit from Stoicism.

Are you a worrisome person? Then you do.

It’s not very difficult to notice if you have a lot of worries. They’re giving you stress and anxiety daily, you’re having bad or no sleep and you can’t do anything outside of your comfort zone.

Those are the signs. Do you have them? Good news. You’re going to practice Stoicism now.

Let’s start by explaining what Stoicism is.

What Is Stoicism?

Stoicism is a philosophy that was founded in ancient days that mainly focuses on separating emotion from events that happen.

Ryan Holiday wrote a lot of books about Stoicism so that a “simplified” version of this philosophy is accessible to all of us. He wrote, “The Daily Stoic” which tells you a Stoic thought to think about every day.

That’s 365 Stoic practices.

Most people can’t be 100% Stoic. It’s a difficult lifestyle to keep up with every day.

We all have our emotions and thoughts that rush through our brains like maniacs and sometimes we feel like we can’t take them away.

Stoicism is that part of your new lifestyle that helps you to understand those feelings.

Start Developing Healthy Habits

If you want to be a happy and mindful person, you need to develop good habits and get rid of the bad ones.

Habits aren’t forever.

You need to have the “courage” to change yourself. Most of us don’t and get stuck in our own lives.

One thing that might help is meta-habits:

  • Track your habits
  • Create predictable morning routines
  • Don’t overdo it
  • Journaling
  • Exercise

Healthy Habit: Meditation

Building a strict habit of meditation each morning and evening gives you some extra breathing space. I use Wim Hof’s breathing methods and have been using a regular meditation technique on the side to calm down.

  1. Sit down and close your eyes.
  2. Slowly breathe in and visualize the air coming into your lungs.
  3. Keep your breath for a couple of seconds and breathe out again. (visualize that as well)
  4. Repeat that for a minute or two. (how long as you think you need it)

You can use this to start the day or end it by calming yourself down.

Mostly, I use it for falling asleep after a busy day. It’s perfect for those of you that can’t fall asleep as easily as you’d want to.

Stoic Practise: Stop Worrying About The Things You Can’t Control

It’s a little cliche to tell someone worried about something to stop worrying about it because you can’t influence or control it.

But what can you do?

Letting things you can’t control decide or change the path of your life is so energy-consuming. You’re literally tired after being worried about these things.

One of the examples I came across recently is that someone in the streets came up to us and asked us if he could ask us something (we knew these guys, they were going to ask for money).

My girlfriend said no and he started throwing ugly words at us and then walked away.

After such an event, my day is ruined.

It’s such a shame that a comment from one person can ruin my day so much that Stoicism had to offer something. But the key is practice.

It’s like a muscle.

You can’t expect to hit the gym and go home with a six-pack after a week.

That’s the same with your brain and feelings. Train them and you’ll eventually stop caring about these things.

Final Thoughts & Takeaways

Emotions of people are as old as you can think of but it’s only a couple of years now that those are being spoken about more than in the past.

There used to be a big taboo on talking about your feelings.

Especially if you were a man.

Causes many of us don’t know how to talk about it in a proper way which causes violent situations. Those feelings are coming out in the end.

Stoicism and many other philosophies teach us how to deal with our feelings and emotions.

Weekly inspiration and Tips to Rewire Yourself

Sign up to Rewire Yourself for free and receive a weekly newsletter about the most interesting topics to make yourself a better human.

Join 5,000+ smart people