For years and years, I have dealt with the lack of self-esteem, confidence, self-love, or self-respect. The lack of confidence comes in many forms, and anybody can be the victim of it.
Every book or article online about mental health and self-improvement tells you to love yourself, grow your confidence, and really be you, but what if you don’t know how to achieve that goal or are like me, don’t have the guts to do so?
Gee Hair did a survey in the United Kingdom, which tells us that 55% of the men think others do not like them, and 80% think they are unattractive. With women, this is 85%.
And more than half of the young people in the UK find it important what other people think of them.
Lacking confidence can really bother you in your daily life. Social anxiety is something that comes hand in hand with this.
“Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?” — Brigham Young
I assume that this is no different in The Netherlands, where I live. A lack of self-esteem in our society. A problem that could cause problems regarding finding work, meeting other people, and just living a happy life.
This article will go through 5 techniques that you could apply to increase your confidence, step by step.
Put yourself in a healthy body.
This is a cliche, of course, happy body, happy mind — we know! But over the years, the value of this fact has decreased because of so many people using this as a quote.
Being healthy also causes us to like ourselves more in a physical sense.
When we don’t like our bodies, our self-esteem suffers as a result. The worst-case scenario is that individuals would suffer from despair, trauma, and self-hatred, with the most severe consequences including self-harm, eating disorders, and social isolation.
When you speak about healthy bodies, people often refer to diets, which is not what I mean.
Even though conventional dieting may be successful for some people, the advantages are usually short-lived because the habits and causes of weight gain are not addressed.
Dieting is seldom enjoyable.
As a result, we consider it denial, a means to an end, and something we want to be over and done with as soon as we reach our goals.
Try to eat healthy food more often. What we consume has an impact on both our physical and emotional well-being.
It is possible to feel better by fueling our bodies with the meals they need while avoiding the items that make us ill or lethargic. Our mood improves.
Speak to yourself and become aware of your issues
Major mental disorders do not usually manifest themselves out of nowhere.
Before a disease manifesting itself in its full-blown form, family, friends, instructors, and even people themselves may notice subtle changes or a sense that something is not quite right about their thoughts, emotions, or behavior.
It is beneficial to be aware of emerging symptoms or early warning signals and take action as soon as possible. Early intervention may assist in lessening the severity of a medical condition.
The severe mental disease may even be delayed or prevented entirely if the right steps are taken.
Once you’ve recognized potentially troublesome circumstances, pay close attention to your internal dialogue.
If you or someone you know needs assistance, don’t be hesitant to ask for help. Educating yourself as much as possible about mental health is a critical first step.
Surround yourself with people that make you happy
You should meet people who make you happy, obvious ones, right? Not always.
The people with whom you spend the majority of your time have a significant impact on your emotions, how you see the world, and the expectations you have of yourself.
When striving for greater levels of success, you must surround yourself with individuals that inspire you and push you to higher levels of achievement.
When you surround yourself with positive individuals, you are more likely to embrace powerful ideas and view life as something that happens to you rather than something that happens to them.
In the same way that you gain from surrounding yourself with individuals who make you happy, you suffer when those in your professional or social circles are negative or limited in their perspectives.
Always keep in mind that the people with whom you spend the majority of your time will shape who you ultimately become.
It is not always easy, but it is well worth the effort.
Accept the way you think and try not to get overwhelmed
Accept unpleasant ideas and emotions rather than battling, opposing, or being overwhelmed by them.
You don’t have to like them; all you have to do is experience them.
As soon as you become aware of the ideas and beliefs contributing to your poor self-esteem, you can either reject them or alter your perspective on them. This will facilitate the acceptance of your worth as a person.
Confidence and a general feeling of well-being are likely to improve as your self-esteem grows.
Learn to like yourself
This is something that I struggle with for ages and ages. I sometimes hate myself for being me. I can’t deal with the fact that people possibly like me.
I know this isn’t good, and I need to work on this. And in theory, I know how to do it, but it only works if you act on it.
One of the most difficult parts of increasing self-esteem is that we are more resistant to compliments when we are unhappy with ourselves — even when we need them the most.
The desire to deny or reject compliments will diminish with time, which is a good sign that your self-esteem improves.
Set a goal for yourself to accept compliments when you get them, even if they make you uncomfortable, which they will almost certainly do.
“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” — Buddha
The bottom line is that increasing one’s self-esteem takes time and effort since it entails establishing and sustaining better emotional habits.
However, doing so, and particularly doing it properly, will result in a significant emotional and psychological return on your investment.
However, if we continue to believe that we must have the confidence to be successful, we will miss the true purpose of life, which is to realize our aspirations.
Confidence is something that grows over time, and that will feel like a reward.